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Shine your brightest.
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LIA
Some things are better off as secrets. Links
Layout: vehemency |
Wednesday, January 2, 2008, 4:43 PM
helloi'm not feeling really good. ); school was fine today. but i'm suddenly reminded of stuff, suprisingly, i didn't feel much today, not as much as i thought i would i thought i was going mad at meeting so many people, well i didn't. phew, and i didn't feel much even when i saw you. but i don't know why, now, i feel so bloody weird. to be honest, i really feel like crying. i'm alone at home now, which gives me the chance to cry if i want to. ); bah, cry like got use meh? i really don't know anymore. i don't know where i've gone also, i don't feel myself too much anymore. ); i feel i've changed, i can only be myself when i'm happy, which i try to be, but recently, can't. why? some reason. i'm so messed up, really really messed up. damn damn damn. i don't know what to do anymore, i don't know why, but i just feel like crying. what nonsense is this? i have no idea. i look cheery, and i am, but sometimes not... things are different ..... i hate myself, for being so stupid. really dumb. i feel like tearing THAT THING so much! so frustrated, so angry, so upset, with myself. only I can control my own feelings, so why not? shouldn't i make myself happy? you're not worth. yeah, you aren't. so i shall, soon enough. i'll be ready, i'm giving chances, no more. if i continue, i'll DIE. (x one really fucked up, super crappy post. goodbye. ); i wish it didn't seem like you cared. maybe i think too much. but, care if you want to, don't care if you don't want to, don't ACT like you care. talk to me, if you want to, don't talk if you don't wanna, don't make it seem like you're gonna talk, but you never do open your mouth... then again, maybe i just think too much. DAMN. |